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How To Have Unshakable Confidence/Self Esteem

unshakable self esteem

Self-esteem is one of the biggest factors that decide success in every area of your life. How much will you earn, how better would you perform in an exam, how good relationships you can maintain with other people, all these things depends on your self-esteem.

Let’s start by understanding the difference between confidence, courage, and self-esteem.

Confidence is your belief in your abilities that you can perform great in a particular task/job/area.

Courage is attempting/performing the task despite fear.

Self-esteem means an overall sense of self-worth or personal value. In other words, how much you appreciate, trust yourself and like yourself. Having high self-esteem will help you excel in every area of your life. It means, currently you might not be so good in a particular skill, but having high self-esteem means having faith/belief in yourself that you will learn it and become an expert soon.

Here are the steps to increase your self-esteem and become unstoppable:

Self-awareness/Living consciously:

Be aware of all of your strengths, weakness, powers, and problems. Don’t live your life like a robot. Ask the following questions from yourself.

  • Why are you doing things that you do?
  • What are your biggest goals/desires?
  • What are your biggest fears/insecurities?
  • What do you love about yourself the most?
  • Which habits/behavior do you hate about yourself most?
  • What makes you happy?
  • What makes you angry?
  • What makes you sad/anxious?
  • What makes you proud?
  • What are your biggest values?

Being aware of yourself and your values thoroughly will help you make better decisions in life

Also, try to live in the present being aware of everything around you rather than remembering your past or worrying about your future.

Self-acceptance:

Accept your strengths, weaknesses, desires, problems, powers without judgment. Change can happen only after acceptance. If you live your life in denial that you don’t have any weaknesses/ problems, you can’t overcome it.

Note: Self-acceptance shouldn’t be confused with complacency. The only way to become better is to accept yourself as you are now, otherwise, you’ll waste all of your time feeling guilty over your past mistakes.

Self-responsibility:

Be responsible for every area of your life. If you play victim and blame world for your current condition, you will never find inner energy/power to transform your life.

You might not have 100% control over life, but you definitely have 100% control over how you react to various events in life. Taking responsibility gives you the power to transform your thought process which in turn will change external reality for you.

Note: Being optimistic and solution-oriented rather than problem finder can be a game-changer for your thought process and life.

Be authentic:

To practice self-assertiveness is to live authentically, to speak and act from your innermost convictions and feelings.

Lies make you weak and full of fears. If you don’t know something, say it. If you aren’t good at something, tell it. There is no one in the world who is good at everything. You don’t need to be perfect to live life confidently, you just need to be authentic.

Living purposefully:

It means to use our powers for the attainment of goals we have selected. It’s our goals that push us forward and makes us feel fulfilled. Bigger the goal, greater the energy will be generated inside us to achieve that goal.

Note: Thinking big and having a purpose bigger than yourself will boost your self-esteem manyfold. Example: Entrepreneurs have higher self-esteem than people who do a regular job. Great leaders have high self-esteem as their purpose is much bigger than themselves: To uplift every single person in the world. You don’t necessarily need to have such bigger goals but you should definitely start thinking big and take bigger roles. Never be afraid of taking bigger roles in your organisation/social groups. Bigger roles will help you achieve respect from society as well as higher self-esteem in your own eyes. Similarly, You can take bigger roles in your social circles. Mentor someone, Be someone’s hero and this thing alone will give you unlimited confidence.

Personal integrity:

It means to live your life with values. It doesn’t mean necessarily to comply with rules or standards set by society but to live with your personal values. Don’t be a hypocrite. Don’t do things that you don’t like about others. Also, live your life with integrity. Give power to your words. Keep your promises even if it’s difficult to do.

If you want to boost your self-esteem quickly, here are some tips/strategies to overcome low self esteem :

  • Dress well: How you present yourself to society has an impact on your self-esteem. So, be well-groomed and dress well.
  • Gym/ Physical exercise: Having an ideal body will help you increase your self-esteem. Also, the release of endorphins/dopamine during exercise will help you to become a more positive/optimistic person.
  • Do things that match your strengths/passions: Do things in which you are really good at. It can be anything like dance, singing, cooking, solving puzzles or playing sports you love.
  • Uplift others: Help others grow and live to the full potential. “When one teaches, two learn.” Helping others will make you feel fulfilled, happier and wiser. It will also help you make better relationships with people which will be really beneficial for you in the long term.
  • Try new things: Learning new skills will give you a sense of accomplishment and also make you an interesting and confident person. Move out of your comfort zone, show courage to fight your fear of shame and go try out new things. Also, don’t be afraid of failures/rejections.Go out of your comfort zone and face your biggest fears.Go out of your comfort zone and face your biggest fears. It’s your failures that teach you the most and bring the best person out of you.
  • Have positive self talk: Make your inner voice your best friend. Turn negative self-talk into positive one. Try to see your problems as opportunities to grow. Remind yourself of your strengths, your past achievements. If you could achieve all those things in the past, why can’t you achieve this goal? Human minds have infinite potential. We can do anything if we set our intention on that thing and try various strategies for achieving it. Become grateful for what you have: It will help you have a positive outlook towards life and have an abundance mindset. You will stop complaining and playing the victim.
  • Change your self-image: It’s a permanent and most effective solution. Top Athletes don’t practice hard because of motivation or any other external factor. They do because this is how they know themselves. Change your subconscious mind using Affirmations/Visualisations. Become a person who thinks big, gives his personal best in each moment, who loves challenges, who is not afraid of failures, speaks his truth, is authentic, does no harm to others, speaks impeccable, spreads happiness and uplifts others.
  • Love, trust and respect yourself: Stop judging and criticising yourself. If you love yourself completely, you will use your body, mind, intellect to achieve your goals. If you hate yourself, these things will start working against you. So, Always accept yourself, love yourself, respect yourself and trust yourself. If you do so, you will also get love, trust, and respect from everyone around you.

If you want to know more about the topic, Please check the following videos:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dhuabY4DmEo

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LyedG6y30v4

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2i0E12PbGCg

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